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Deck The Calls (A Winter Punderland)

by Cory & Kirsty Call

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lyrics

Happy Christmas Kirsty, well I’ve loved you all year long
Can’t afford no presents, so I wrote you this damn song

Now I’m roasting chestnuts in this motel 6 alone
Wonderful Life’s playing over porn on my phone
And I just spilled my eggnog all over the floor

Merry Christmas Cory, things are not as you perceive
It’s not your package that this girl wants to receive

I don’t want your tinsel spraying all over my tree
There’s only one thing that I want that starts with D

-D-I-V-O-R-C-E-

Give me a divorce for Christmas,
Give me a divorce it’s on top of my wish list
I’ve been good all year, I want a divorce
Santa tell your elves, to send him straight to Hell, cause baby you no longer jingle my bell

My North Pole is lonely and it’s freezing in the cold,
It wants your warm ginger bread house to call it’s home
I ain’t trying to bake no god damn cookies in your stove
I can pull out and spread my icing on your dough

I’m sick and tired of being white washed with your snow
I longer wanna be your Christmas Ho-ho-ho
You stuff my stocking, but all I get is coal
I want a - I want a divorce this year, you know

Give me a divorce for Christmas
Give me a divorce it’s on top of my wish list
I’ve been good all year I want a divorce
Rudolph with your nose so bright, just take her away tonight
I’ll leave you reindeer feed out on the lawn
Just make sure by morning she’ll be gone

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind? Should auld acquaintance be forgot, and you can KISS MY ASS GOODBYE

This is the last year, I’ll give you Christmas cheer
I’ll no longer ride you like Santa rides his eight reindeer
Starting the new year, your candy cane ain’t welcome here
Last Christmas still ringing in my ear

In the meadow we can build a snowman
And pretend that he is parson Brown
He’ll say are you married, we’ll say FUCK NO MAN
But you can do the job, sign the papers, make it official when you’re in town
Give me a divorce for Christmas
It’s time we take the decorations down

credits

released December 16, 2018
Written and recorded by Cory & Kirsty Call, December 2018

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Cory & Kirsty Call Munich, Germany

Just two ridiculous human beings destined to be together, trading a steady pay for the highway

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